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Adopt a pet rock as your emotional support.
Your tweets are like a mixtape of midlife crises and existential dread—congratulations, you’ve just invented the soundtrack to a breakdown! Maybe next year, instead of tweeting your thoughts, you could try writing them down and burying them in a time capsule for future archaeologists to find. Who knows? They might discover your emotional state alongside a fossilized dinosaur. At least then, you'd be contributing to history instead of just filling up the timeline with your personal soap opera.
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